Powerful Self-Care Practices for the Holidays

Photo: Sixteen Miles Out / Unsplash

As the holiday season looms once again on the horizon, it is an opportune moment to check in with yourself and examine how you’re feeling about the weeks ahead. Whether virtual or in-person, you may find yourself attending parties with colleagues, family gatherings, or happy hours with friends - not to mention decorating, traveling, shopping, and keeping up with all of your day-to-day tasks and responsibilities. A brief glance at the calendar this time of year can bring on a tidal wave of anxiety, even for the most extroverted among us.

If you find yourself pointing your gaze deliberately away from your schedule, you’re certainly not alone. A poll shared by the American Psychological Association found that 61 percent of respondents reported an increase in their stress levels around the holidays, and a whopping 68 percent said they experienced more fatigue than at other times of the year. This can be especially perplexing when we look around at the natural world; winter is frequently associated with quiet, stillness, and rest. Many animals go into hibernation, or reduce their activity along with the decrease in daylight - so why, then, do we sometimes demand more of ourselves at this time, and what steps can we take to reduce some of the stress we might feel as a result?

Recognize the Power of “No”

Have you ever found yourself saying “yes” to an invitation, all the while internally sighing, knowing that you had other intentions for that time? It’s easy to do - especially around the holiday season, when the expectation is often to connect (or reconnect) with as many people as possible. It’s important to remember, though, that this expectation comes from outside of ourselves, yet can easily wind up being internalized. We might feel anxiety, resentment, or irritation when we say “yes” anyway, or harbor feelings of guilt, shame, or disappointment when we say “no” - even if it’s how we truly feel.

If this scenario resonates with you, try re-framing the situation as an opportunity to mindfully set boundaries for yourself. A friendly “I appreciate the invitation! Unfortunately I have a prior commitment” can suffice, but saying “no” does not always have to mean flatly declining an invite. It could instead mean the suggestion of an alternative date, time, or method of getting together, which demonstrates to the other person that you still want to spend time with them. An even more flexible option might be arriving late to the event, or leaving early (with a polite heads-up, of course!) to give yourself the space you need in your schedule. 

Photo: Lilartsy / Unsplash

The word “no” does not have to carry a decidedly negative connotation. Rather, it can be a powerful tool to help you protect some of your most precious resources - your time, your energy, and your wellbeing. 

Engage with Intention

Browse through the pre-holiday headlines on major news sites, and you will inevitably find several pieces centered around a common theme: preparing to share physical (or virtual) space with loved ones who hold drastically different views. Now, it’s no secret that the past two-ish years have changed many relationships, in some cases dramatically. Opinions on any number of topics have become increasingly politicized and polarized, not uncommonly resulting in conflict. While it is of course important to evaluate each invitation and exercise the power of “no” to assert healthy boundaries around your time and energy, it is entirely possible to find yourself wanting to attend a gathering, despite knowing that there will be someone there with whom there is potential for conflict.

In this case, approaching the exchange from a highly intentional place can be tremendously helpful. Examine what you know about this person (or people) - are there any topics where you can see the possibility of common ground? Have they welcomed a new family member, adopted a pet, or achieved a personal goal? Contemplate the subjects you’ll likely be able to discuss with ease, and perhaps even craft some questions in advance to steer the interaction in those pleasant directions. Keeping such questions “up your sleeve,” while also practicing mindful communication techniques, can help keep the conversation both friendly and free-flowing. 

Keep On Movin’

A quick search for “holiday fitness” will return a mix of membership sales for various exercise facilities, tips for maintaining a workout routine during the winter season, and an array of fitness challenges in various lengths. The importance of moving your body despite a chaotic seasonal schedule is well established, but less often acknowledged is the motivation behind such discussion. 

To be very clear: this is not about “working off” holiday meals or “earning” treats, nor is it related to the commonly-touted “new year, new you” mentality attached to workout-based New Years’ resolutions. Such language is highly reflective of toxic diet culture, and can be both counterproductive and downright destructive. Rather, prioritizing movement during the holiday season may be viewed as another facet of nourishing your body, and of overall wellness. If you already have an existing movement routine that works well for you and can fit seamlessly into a changing schedule, great! If not, try looking at things through a creative lens:

Did you have to sprint through the airport to catch a flight? Sounds like some great cardio!

Was the escalator out of order at the mall, and instead you had to take the stairs? No StairMaster needed today.

Were your cousin’s children using you as a human jungle gym all evening at the family get-together? Perhaps you can forgo upper body exercises! 

Photo: Shashi Chaturvedula / Unsplash

It is also important to note that movement can be gentle. With fatigue being a common feeling this time of year, there may be days where the energy for higher-intensity exertion is simply not there - and that is okay! A few simple stretches, or even a restorative or yin yoga practice can be a wonderful way to show your body some love.

Even if it must be scheduled, exercise does not have to be just another item to check off your to-do list. Intentional movement can be a means to process the events of your day (especially if it involved tense or draining interactions!), work through strong emotions, or simply carve out some time and space that is only for you.

Stress and fatigue can feel unavoidable as the holiday season draws near, but they don’t have to be! Exercising the power of “no,” interacting with intention, and prioritizing mindful movement can all be tremendously empowering strategies to help minimize seasonal strain and navigate the chaos with confidence.